I'm Back!

I'm back in business, I hope I wasn't missed that much and everyone has had a wonderful and healthy month!

After multiple doctor and hospital visits, a blood transfusion and all sorts of medications, I'm revived! I have a possible thyroid problem which messes with my hormones and cranial hypertension (IIH) which gives me a non stop headache and it's getting better. My mother finally arrived from the Dominican Republic and has nursed me back to health. Thank God for mothers, I don't know what I would've done without her. I took almost two weeks off from work and dedicated time to me and it felt wonderful.

I'm in the process of giving myself a mini makeover and just renewing my look. I really want to give my apartment a makeover but that would be much more expensive.

I feel like my old self again! I felt like I've been lost for years when it has been months but I'm glad everything has worked out and nothing crucial happened.

I'm thankful for my mother, my hasband and my sister for all their care. It's nice to feel you have people around you that you can count on and are just there to love you and embrace you. My husband never let go of my hand and I always knew and felt how much he loves me. My sister is like my second mother, called me every single hour and took me to the doctors and the hospital. She always knows the questions to ask and how to handle every situation. She is a strong woman and I'm glad to have her around as a role model. We as women all need to be strong independent women and she has taught me that. My mother no words can explain what she means to me. No matter how old I get or what I do in life she has the power to make me feel like her little baby. As soon as she got to NY she gave me vitamins, iron juices, just everything. She knew exactly what to do and when. She put me under her wing and made sure I was okay. She took me every where to doctors, the hospital, acupuncture just everything. She prepares breakfast, lunch and dinner to make sure I'm okay. The love and the comfort I feel with her is undescriable, I don't feel that with no one else. I feel my mother is there 100% no matter what.

I hope one day I can just like that with my children and make them feel the same way. It's amazing nothing like your mother.

How old is too old to have a baby?

I read a blog that sparked my interest. One of my favorite bloggers posted a blog about a woman having a child at 66. I looked into it and I also found story at MSNBC.com:

Adriana Iliescu, the 66-year-old Romanian who gave birth to baby girl on Jan. 17, 2005. She delivered at the Giulesti Maternity Hospital in Bucharest, Romania. So far she is the oldest to have a baby. The 66-year-old unmarried professor and writer had a emergency C-section. Her doctor, when asked why he would use reproductive technology to permit a 66-year-old woman to become pregnant, said he helped her because that is what she wanted to do, and because he was impressed with her faith in God and with her “determination."

As I reply to the blog I was struggling to make a decision weather I think she should have been allowed to do this. When you first hear about the story you think, no she is definitely to old !!! What is she doing?? But when you take a moment and think. If she wanted to become a mother and experience this, she does have the right. Every woman has the right to experience this wonderful ability. We are biologically here for purpose, we are to bear children. If not men would also have the ability to deliver a child. Who is to say when she should have stopped trying. She kept the hope alive. We never know what she was thinking or feeling. Was there a reason she didn't adopt earlier in life?.. If there was a little slim chance for her to get pregnant not matter what age she was, she would've taken it because that's what she wanted, that was her choice as a woman. Maybe she was thinking better late than never...

Now I was interested in this story because it hit home sort of. My mother was 38-39 when she had me. She too was worried about having a baby at that age but she was remarried and my father was 28 (yes my mother "the cougar" they call her) so he wanted to have a baby. My sister was 20 and my brother was 18 years old so for my mother it not only was taking risks health wise but mentally for her to start over with diapers, crying etc. I'm glad she decided to have me because obviously I'm wonderful (lol kidding), but she always said that when I was born I rejuvenated her. She felt alive again and even though the age was an issue, she doesn't regret it, one because of my father and two because of the overall blessing and joy a woman experiences when she has a baby.

But now this baby has grown up and my mother has gotten older. This whole process was great for my mother and I imagine also for the new 66 year old mother. But when you think about the child, it's not fair. The older mother is probably not going to live a long time, I mean I'm not God but she isn't going to be able to run and actively take care of the baby. Then soon it's going to be the baby taking care of her and that's prob going to start sooner than usual.

My mother couldn't be as active for games and things, I had to rely on my much older brother and sisters. Another thing is that our thoughts are so different because of the gap and don't get me wrong my mother and I have the a great relationship but I do wish my mother was younger. The most worrisome thing I deal with is, losing her. I'm so afraid of her leaving me, I can't imagine it but it's reality. I'm 24 and she 63, I want her to see my kids and just grow old with me. I want my children to experience her.. She isn't sick or anything but my niece is 21 and the others are 14-19 so they got to grow up with a grandmother and remember everything about her. I don't want to rush and have children but of it but it's something I do think about and struggle with. This is my case imagine the child of this woman, you have to worry if anything happens to her, who is going to care for the infant?

I don't want to say that I'm against this and mad about it because it's her choice. But I don't agree with it, it comes off some what selfish.

Interesting topic.

Opinions?

Thanx for your time,

Simply Denisi <3

Happy Monday.. Happy Belated Mama's DAY!

Good evening my dear readers.. Yesterday I decided to create a real full blown website. It'll contain not only my blog but my wanna-be modeling photos and little bio and where I'm going with creation.

I'm a little nervous because I haven't applied to grad school and I've missed all application deadlines, I decided to go to NYU and now I need some help. Tomorrow I will email my helper to see if they can create a miracle and get me in. If not I will have to wait until Fall of 2010 to start and I definitely don't want that.

I've also been reading Naturally Thin: Unleash your skinny girl. I love it! I love the author, she is from The Housewives of NYC show on Bravo. She is the best and the most entertaining. Her book basically give you ten rules that your should follow to take control of your eating habits. I was a little iffy about the book because I'm like this bitch has never been fat so what can she tell me about the struggle. I'm reading up on rule number 3 and so far so good. Its common sense but sometimes you need to be told the obvious to actually realize whats happening. So I'm enjoying the book during my train rides.

Mother's Day was okay this year. I spent the entire day with my mother and my sister came by with my nephews for a few. And that's about it. I wish I could've done more but nowadays we are in a recession so we are on a budget. Next year I defintly want to throw my mother a big birthday bash because this year we didn't do anything.

So that's a little wrap up on my monday.. Well have a wonderful good night..

Simply Denisi <3.